Hey Girl, You're Beautiful

"Hey, girls, you're beautiful. Don't look at those stupid magazines with sticklike models. Eat healthy and exercise. That's all. Don't let anyone tell you you're not good enough. You're good enough, you are too good. Love your family with all your heart and listen to it. You are gorgeous, whether you're a size 3 or 14. It doesn't matter what you look like on the outside, as long as you're a good person, as long as you respect others. I know it's been told hundreds of times before, but it's true. Hey, girls, you are beautiful." -Gerard Way

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hey Girl, You're Beautiful [.oneshot.]

With her stubby, fat fingers, Abigail shuts her locker and shifts the books around her waist. Toby walks next to her chattering on and on about some game he found out about recently. Abby hardly pays attention and shift the books again, pulling them closer to her waist then up against her chest to hide her fat.

Her arms fold over the books as if a shield and exposing the excessive meat on her bones and she fights a gag. People walking down the halls, meet her eyes and stare at her double chin. Toby and her turn right and take the stairs to the first floor, dodging people going upwards. With every step she takes, her blubber shakes. With every step. Reaching the last landing, Abby skips the last two stairs and immediately regrets it.

Her head spun and her stomach growled at the same time. She regrets triggering the nuisance. But she doesn't regret skipping breakfast . . . and lunch. Toby is lost in his own thoughts to care and she's thankful for that.

Her clothes sway with the wind as they make their way to sixth period health. "Are you listening to me?" he asks finally.

"Huh? Oh," she chuckles, "Nope."

He sighs, "I knew it. Well, see you in seventh period." he disappears into his sixth period science class.

She waves a bit then enters her health class with the teacher at her desk and half of the students already here. In order to slink into her seat, she sucks in her stomach and puts the books down on the floor next to her converse. The teacher that is fatter than Abby herself stands in the front of the room and starts the lesson on why smoking is bad..

Abby looks down at her health book and opens it to the page then tunes off. Her thoughts disappear to how ugly she is. She's got some horribly stubby fingers. Her thighs are oversized with stretch marks and anyone a mile away can see her double chin. The way it moves when she laughs disgusts her. Everything about her disgusts her.

Her eyes are pale and have purple bags under them; effect of insomnia home. Her nose is too wide. Her lips are always chapped. Her hair is thinning and narrow. Her skin is an inane tone and her face is full of black spots. Her stomach is always sucked in, though it is no use. Her fat hangs over and everywhere.

Her stomach is what she hates the most. Those atrocious layers of fat and skin and blubber. When someone pokes her stomach, they jiggle. When someone grips her stomach, they instantaneously feel the thickness. Like tires. Atrocious. Disgusting.

But then she reminds herself it's better than what she used to have. She was obese. Thirteen and obese. Now she was fifteen and just fat. Just ugly. Just disgusting.

She used to be horrendous.
The epitome of everything horrid.

Eventually, her insecurities got the best of her she stopped eating.

Now, she's still stopping. She's still not eating. And she'll continue until she reaches her dream weight.

She'll want to slice her skin at nights but she knows it's not the same as floating feeling when you don't eat. When you resist the meals. When you hide from your mom and tell her that you had some ramen.

It's not the same. She likes feeling lightheaded. Like something about her is actually light. Like she doesn't cause a fucking earthquake with every step down the stairs.

Ladies and gentleman, Abigail Marie Lewis is a city girl. She's revolting and she's enormous.

Abigail Marie Lewis feels and believes she weighs 194 pounds. That's she's fat. That she is ugly. No will ever want her and no one will ever like her. She's a filthy fat horrid slut; a fucking foul slob. Good for nothing. A failure. Repulsive. A fat fucking cow.

Ladies and gentleman, Abigail Marie Lewis?

She weighs 87 pounds.